honeybearbee: (wow: naga)
The best laid plans...

I've not been keeping up with my New Year's list. :( First, I got really tired because of my bleeding a lot, so I didn't want to do anything. Then when I was feeling better yesterday, my dog got sick. :(

She's taking meds for this skin allergy thing we don't know how she got. One pill she was on (we're phasing her off of that) makes her hungary all the time. This new one might make her vomit, lethargic, etc. Yesterday, she threw up and just slept most of the time. :((( My poor baby.

But, today I will get things done! I will answer emails, I will read, I WILL DO THINGS.

Also, my eyelid keeps twitching which means I'm stressed. About...something. :/



honeybearbee: (kkm: doll!gunter)





Sometimes I wonder why I do friending memes. I'm so bad at them. I'm horribly shy and just look at everyone and go "Oh! We could be friends!" then I hover over the comment and decided not to because I'm not confident enough. :/ Anyway, I did this one. :D

Does anyone use Ebay? I'd like to try it out and sell some books, movies, CDs, but I don't know much about them or how they work.

TMI )
honeybearbee: (fnv: boone)
Hello hello! I've gotten behind on LJ again, but that's part of my New Years Resolutions! :D

1. Post something to LJ everyday/check flist everyday.

2. Post something to my jobbies everyday (starting on the 1st, I'm going to post a review of this cool web series. I just need to finish watching it, just a few eps left! Tomorrow shall be spent finishing it up and typing.)

3. Read something everyday (Starting with Unfortunate Events)

4. Play one video game at a time to it's end. (Starting with Saints Row 2)

5. Write something everyday (starting with a Merlin fic that needs to get done! And my big bangs!)

And that's it! For now anyway, I'll have to add more if I think of them. I already did number 5 today (http://honeybearbee.dreamwidth.org/8205.html) and I've been reading the comics I got for Christmas.

Speaking of Christmas, it was all right. Mom and I got stuff we wanted, but the White Elephant thing we did at my aunt's was bad. Mom got this candle thing and I got a toy thing. IDK, I'll take pics. Also, no one (NO ONE) asked what mom got for Christmas, but they asked everyone else. :/ I'M NOT HAPPY ABOUT THAT.

Fucking family.
honeybearbee: (disney: scrooge)
Glitter Graphics

Christmas Glitter



I hope everyone has a safe and happy holiday season! <3

Last night on Twitter I posted, "sometimes i wonder if i have met my 'other half' and just don't know it yet". I've been thinking about a boyfriend/girlfriend a lot. Ever since my uncle had that heart attack and I got crazy worried about my mom dying and leaving me all alone. Alone, is the key word. I don't want to be alone forever, but I'm afraid I would be.

Like, I don't meet people, not in "real life" anyway. I don't know why anyone would want to date me, but Ryan does (that guy from my WoW guild). However, we don't talk all that much anymore. He plays SWTOR a lot and I messaged him last on FB. I guess I could try again. And I dated Jason (from HS who is now message me again) and Rachel (<3), but I don't know. Talking to people is hard. :( I'm pretty awkward and nerdy, like a specific type of nerdy too. I don't think I'm that pretty, especially not with all my facial hair (damn genetics, fuck me over every time).

And when I think about being intimate, I freak out. I'm 26 and never been kissed, which is fine, but doesn't lessen my anxiety about anything. Ideally, I think I'd like my first time to be with a woman, since I'm much more at ease with them. But they can be just as sketchy as men. :/ I don't know. I'm sure I'll think about this stuff as I get closer to 30.

My cousin Andrea came out like a year or two ago, which is great for her. I don't know if I ever could come out to anyone besides my mom. My grandma might understand about Andrea (her favorite), but she wouldn't about me. I think my whole family would give me shit about it and ignore me, but if it's Andrea, well that's ok. :/ I might as well just write a book about all my family drama and come out that way. *sigh*

Anyway, that was pretty emo for Christmas! XD I'm off to finish backing cookies with my mom! :D Have a good day tomorrow everyone!

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Nikki

January 2013

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